A Bite-Sized Tour of Hall Food

There’s no denying it: Oxford can be a lot, and there never seem to be enough hours in the day. Within the pressure cooker that is Oxford term time, even if you love cooking, making your own meals can sometimes feel like just another drain on your precious time and energy. Equally, there’s a limit to how often you can buy a meal deal or order takeaway before your patience with either option begins to boil over.

Luckily, there is a solution to your mealtime woes: Hall. In theory, at least, your college Hall is somewhere you can buy an inexpensive and nutritious warm meal, before dashing off to spend enough time in the library to withstand the grilling in your next tutorial. But there are stark differences between Oxford colleges – and Hall food is no exception to this. Going to another college for lunch or informal dinner is always an interesting experience – and one I would thoroughly recommend. But how to decide which Hall to try? Don’t worry, you’ve come to the right place.

The following is a thoroughly unscientific report based on my experiences with different colleges’ informal Hall food over the years. To make it slightly more reliable, I have also collected direct quotes from students at every college listed, who eat there on a regular basis. Which Halls rise to the occasion, and which are roasted by its students? Dig in and find out!

Balliol:

My experience: Despite the verdict below, I have moderately enjoyed every meal I have eaten in Balliol Hall, and the food isn’t horrendously expensive. The dark wood of Balliol’s Hall already makes it look gothic and striking, and the organ only adds to this effect.

Balliol student verdict: “What Balliol food sometimes lacks in style it makes up for in substance. Literally – sometimes I don’t know what substance they are serving. You clearly either came on a good day or have no tastebuds.” [Author’s note: I would like to defend that I do, in fact, have tastebuds].

Christ Church:

My experience: Having worked on residential summer programmes at Christ Church twice, I can testify that the catering team is extremely skilled. Unfortunately, when Oxford students return, the incredible food quality takes a nose-dive.

Christ Church student verdict: “The quality of the Christ Church meals varied wildly. Every day was a roll of the dice between a perfect vegetable lasagne, a passable cheesy broccoli pasta, an uninspired tofu dish, or – heaven forbid – no substantial vegetarian option at all.”

Exeter:

My experience + Exeter student verdict: As my undergraduate college, I have a lot of love for Exeter, so it pains me to admit that its Hall food is far from stellar. The vegetarian options are particularly at fault. However, it is the cheapest Hall food I’ve eaten in Oxford and usually comes in generous portions. The salad bar contains many inventive options: (strawberry, cucumber, red onion and feta salad, for example!)

Lincoln:

My experience: In general, decent with a good range of options, although they are prone to repeating various menu items. I’ve had Spaghetti Bolognese at Lincoln twice, despite only visiting a couple of times. See below for more examples…

Lincoln student verdict: “In search of endless varieties of cheesecake? Looking for more ways to cook potatoes than Samwise Gamgee could ever dream of? Then Lincoln catering is for you.”

Lady Margaret Hall:

My experience: They have water dispensers containing slices of lemon. It’s beautiful. LMH food itself is staggeringly excellent: some of the best Hall food I’ve eaten. Its pricing was also staggering. Already not particularly cheap, my friend and I had failed to notice the 60% price hike for non-LMH students. Both myself and my wallet rapidly went through several stages of grief upon realising this. Not very #WelLMH…

LMH student verdict: “Usually very tasty, with a good range of options every day. It can be a bit pricey, the vegan versions of meat items are often weird, as can be the flavour combinations in formal desserts – but equally the best formal food I’ve had in Oxford has been at LMH!”

Merton:

My experience: Merton food is very good value for money and generally delicious. Get in the lunch queue early enough and you can pick up some leftover portions of SCR desserts. What’s not to love?

Merton student verdict: “Top notch. Pretty cheap. Weird obsession with carbohydrates. You could have five kinds of carbohydrates on your plate at one time and three of them are potatoes.”

New:

My experience + New student verdict: Having switched to New College for my master’s, my experience with its catering so far has been very positive. While on the more expensive side, the food is usually tasty, with a good range of vegetables at every meal. If you come at lunchtime, expect to be offered chips, which they serve with pretty much everything. Another unusual feature is the conveyor belt that automatically carries away your trays and cutlery!

Pembroke:

My experience: Not my favourite Hall food. Apart from a sadly shrivelled cod Florentine, what most sticks out in my memory are the gigantic semicircular caricature paintings above the balcony. The most interesting and unusual art I’ve seen in an Oxford Hall to date.

Pembroke student verdict: “Pembroke Hall food has a reputation of being bad and expensive. I would say it’s quite hit or miss. I do feel permanently traumatised by their vegetarian options.”

Somerville:

My experience: Somerville Hall is beautiful, and the food was great. The only Hall I’ve been to that has offered arancini as an informal lunch option. It’s also the only Hall in Oxford whose portraits are entirely of women!

Somerville student verdict: “Recently graduated friends returning to Oxford often request to come along to Somerville brunch. An emphasis on sustainably sourced food, including many nice vegetarian and vegan options, further contributes to the college’s progressive atmosphere…after all, you are what you eat! (In my case, mainly hash browns…)”

St Peter’s:

My experience: The best hash browns I have eaten in Oxford were at St Peter’s brunch, so my impression of this college’s food is largely positive. This impression is not universally shared. Messaging a journalistic source – err, I mean friend – from Peter’s about this article, her response was immediate: “When do you need it by? I’m going to cook up something scathing.” So, without further ado…

St Peter’s student verdict: “Do you like flavour? Well, don’t get your hopes up because you’ll find none of it here. For what they lack in flavour, St Peter’s makes up for in the price of said food items. Maybe it’s the price of the food that makes it taste all the more bitter? The only redeeming quality of the food here is the brunch.”

Univ:

My experience: While one of the best formals I have been to was at Univ, its informal Hall food stands firmly in the centre of the road. That said, I have only ever had the meat options at Univ…

Univ student verdict: “Why the [REDACTED] do I have to pay £6.30 for a bowl of plain pasta because that’s the only vegan [REDACTED] they have, because the other option is either meat or cheese. What the [REDACTED], ok, I don’t understand – £6.30.”

So, what are the main takeaways of this whistle-stop tour? A recurrent theme is that, regardless of college, options catering to dietary requirements, particularly those for vegetarians and vegans, are often of significantly lower quality than the meat options. In terms of where to go, LMH, Merton and Somerville stand out as great places to be smuggled into for lunch or dinner. Ultimately, however, if you want to find out more about the Hall food at other colleges, the best way to do so is to go for lunch and see for yourself. Good luck, and bon appétit!