Have you ever been called a ‘Swiftie’? Maybe you shout at the television when your football team loses? Do you self-identify with the term ‘Potterhead’? Are you prone to crying at TV shows? Or have you become obsessed with one celebrity? Perhaps you have unknowingly formed a parasocial relationship. Not to worry… it’s not as bad as it seems!
What is a Parasocial Relationship?
A parasocial relationship is a one-directional relationship towards a celebrity or fictional character, which is usually facilitated through the media. They give us a feeling of connection, intimacy and familiarity without ever actually interacting with the object of our affection. Researchers David Giles and John Maltby have divided parasocial relationships into three subcategories: entertainment-social, intense-personal and borderline-pathological. Most parasocial relationships fall into the first two categories and are relatively harmless, as you are interested in a celebrity or character but are aware that the relationship is not real. However, the third category of borderline-pathological is where things get dangerous, where people can no longer control their feelings. These have led to cases of celebrity stalking, such as those of Kendall Jenner and Harry Styles. These are rare examples of parasocial relationships causing an eclipse in reality and altering concepts of self-identity. While the topic dominates the discussion regarding the effects of social media, it is ultimately rare. It is important to remember that this is uncommon, despite dominating the discussion of the effects of social media. After all, teenagers have had posters of celebrities decorating their bedroom walls for decades; is this just our generation’s equivalent?
Social Media:
With the rise of social media, the term ‘parasocial’ has been increasingly prevalent, implying that this is a modern experience. Mostly, this phenomenon is referred to in a negative context; how it corrupts our youth and endangers our capacity for human interaction. Yet, this is an age-old occurrence. Aristotle’s definition of friendship even alluded to a type of relationship that we might now deem as parasocial. In his view, friendships must be reciprocal and recognised, differentiating them from one-sided relationships with people they are not accustomed to. Researchers have found evidence of what we could now perceive as parasocial relationships in Ancient Greek and Roman societies, with actors, heroes and deities being idolised. Whilst there are obvious differences in idolisation and parasocial relationships, we can see a fundamental element of attachment in human nature. Identities themselves have long been a changing concept, with selfhood in the Medieval period being formed through communal relationships, rather than a sense of individualism. Therefore, is this really a new phenomenon, or has it always been a fundamental part of self-identification?
Rather than inventing parasocial relationships, social media can be seen as merely changing the type of parasocial relationships we form. If we consider the COVID-19 pandemic, we were removed from ‘real’ interaction and forced into parasocial relationships for any form of human contact. The prevalence of social media stars, who gain traction from their likeability and personality, means it is unsurprising that we are drawn to them. This new form of content allows even more attachment than previously attainable; engaging with the everyday lives of our favourite stars in an increasingly personal manner. Celebrities and influencers are aware of this and can often use it to formulate a fanbase, with many getting criticised for ‘falling off’ or losing their ‘relatability’ when their fame increases. But why are we so drawn to them? There is a stereotype that people who form parasocial relationships are lonely and forge these relationships due to an inability to do so in real life. Yet, research by Rachel Forster contradicts this and argues that people who are more sociable in their real lives are more likely to form parasocial relationships.
Impact on Identity:
Can we ever truly form our own identity whilst constantly being surrounded by images and expectations that are unattainable to the average person? In forming identity, we often look at others to see how we can relate and differ from each other, a concept only made easier with the presence of social media. The narrative surrounding social media and parasocial relationships has concentrated on the detriment it has to our mental health and real lives. These include setting unrealistic expectations, emotional dependency, social isolation and even mental health issues. However, these relationships also have many benefits, like alleviating loneliness, giving validation, allowing positive modelling, developing autonomy, and forming identity. In this technological era, it appears that the world is at our fingertips, yet we’re also experiencing a loneliness epidemic. Parasocial relationships can offer us a sense of community and an escape from these isolating feelings. Ironically, social media is both a cause and effect of this phenomenon, showing us a life that we can’t have while offering us a network of people who bond through this shared feeling of isolation. Does this communal identity take away from our sense of self? Our individual identities are often considered lessening when interacting with a communal identity, yet there is a way for them to coincide. Parasocial relationships, then, can be understood as part of facilitating our identities without being all-consuming.
What should we make of this?
Parasocial relationships may be an intrinsic part of developing identity that has been present in our society for centuries. Biologically, we are designed to depend on people. Does it matter if these people are ‘real’ so long as it is healthy and brings happiness to an individual? Just like identities themselves, we should recognise the individuality of parasocial relationships; rather than viewing them as positive or negative, merely considering them as a part of society. The impact of parasocial relationships is unique to each person; some people experience joy, entertainment and whilst others suffer from anxiety and depression. They also affect our real relationships, but rather than diminishing our ability to form human connections, they may be facilitating it or giving solace to those who struggle. These parasocial relationships could help us maintain our real relationships in an increasingly online world in which technology is crucial to human connection. Within limits, parasocial relationships can enhance our lives… but like some many things, moderation is key.