The New Year is one of my favourite times of the year. Not only is it a chance to dress up and have a good time, but also a chance to plan everything to go just right. A perfectionist’s dream. Predictable isn’t it? An Oxford student clinging onto the idea that she can do everything perfectly right. Every year, with probably too much excitement, I sit down, open up a new notebook and write down everything that I want to do that year. This year will be the same, except it won’t be a ‘New Year, New Me’. This year will be a ‘New Year, (not so) New Me’ and I will be sharing a couple of resolutions with you, the reader.
- Attempting to stop procrastinating
Procrastination is a problem most students face. There’s always an imminent essay or problem sheet that needs completing and the temptation is always to say, “I’ll do it later.” It’s not new to my New Year’s resolutions, nor unique. I, like most students, find myself saying this all the time. Now, how to fix this problem? Well, to be honest, I’ve got no idea. Do you? I suppose I’ve just got to do it. Perhaps I could limit distractions? Although, I can find anything distracting so maybe this isn’t the answer. The fundamental problem is that I always get it done and so it doesn’t feel like an issue. But when it’s 3am and I’m only halfway through my essay due that day, it certainly is.
As I’m writing this, I realise that maybe the fundamental problem is that procrastination is exhilarating—it’s a test to see how quickly I can get something done. I imagine you, the reader, can relate to this sentiment. But as I delve into the psychology behind procrastination, I know I’ve got to sort this out (though maybe not today). Perfectionism is a cause of procrastination: “If I can’t do it perfectly, I won’t do it properly.” Procrastination gives you an excuse: “I didn’t have enough time.” At Oxford you often don’t have enough time to complete the seemingly endless reading lists. But that isn’t the problem. The problem is why we add an extra layer to this already difficult task. That’s a question I can’t answer. So, this year I want to find out why I do it. Only then will I finally be able to end the procrastination.
- Saying yes (and learning to say no)
If you know me, you’ll know that I hate saying no. I love trying new things. So, I will say yes to most things. Oxford is a strange place where you’ll encounter interesting concepts: formals, Balls, May Day, Bops, Sub Fusc, Oxmas, and so on. There is a sort of mentality amongst students in Oxford that we can, and should, do it all. We can excel in our studies and be somewhat ‘socialites’. Everything is an opportunity: it’s hard to know what to say yes to and what not to do. So how do I figure this out? Again, I don’t have an answer. Perhaps it plays into the perfectionist mindset that most of us experience: “I can do it all.” I can say yes to a night out, and yes to my essay. However, after we all hit the infamous ‘5th week blues’ we realise that maybe trying to do it all isn’t the best idea. Four terms down, I still haven’t learnt this. But perhaps this is the point. I’ve learnt so much about myself along the way, about what I want to say yes to and what I don’t.
- Exploring identity beyond ‘Oxford’
Oxford is a bubble. The strange traditions, academic prestige, and prominent alumni make it an encapsulating place that you’ll never really escape. Now don’t get me wrong, I quite like the bubble effect it has. A world within a world. Recently, I went to Austria and as I was queueing to board the plane a man turned around to ask if I had a pen. Of course I did. So I sifted through my (disorganised) bag and found it. After seeing my Bod card, he asked if I went to Oxford, to which I said yes. He replied that he was a fellow at a college and we began talking. This isn’t a unique situation where Oxford has somehow ‘found me’. I was travelling home when a lady, seeing my college branded on my shirt, asked me if I studied there. I replied yes, my tone laced with curiosity. She then told me about her best friend, who went to my college 30 years ago or so. A little while later, I was in a coffee shop with my friend and we sat next to an elderly man. Inevitably we began talking to him, and then he mentioned that one of his friends worked at our college. Another ‘coincidence’. Oxford appears to be everywhere now and somehow connects all sorts of people together. This is one of the charms of it. But, I think it’s important for our identity to be more than just ‘an Oxford student.’ Yes, there is life outside of Oxford. And yes, there is life after Oxford. Having dedicated so much of ourselves to get here in the first place, it’s often tempting to think that this is the culmination of who we are.
Reflection
Having written these down, I think that my 2025 New Year Resolutions are important, but in a different way this time. They are not things I want to completely change about myself: the classic ‘New Year, New Me’. My resolutions are realisations about who I am and what I want to do. This perhaps is what I love most about this time of the year. It’s a chance to take the time to reflect on who you actually are and what you actually want to do; it is a chance to re-discover yourself.
So yes, I am part of the 52% who find optimism in the fresh start of a New Year. And hopefully I’ll be part of the 17% who will actually keep their resolutions. Because this year it’s different: it’s a ‘New Year, (not so) New Me.’